The kind of masculinity I was taught growing up has very rigid boundaries. If you had talked to them about happiness, or peace of mind, or thriving, they would have thought you sounded unrealistic and weak. To "man up" must have seemed, to them, the only way to survive. Looking back now, I know that my uncles believed that they were teaching me how to survive. They taught me how to "man up." And it took having my own son to begin to unlearn those lessons.
They modeled that it was okay to date several at one time in fact, that made you a man. My uncles were charismatic and physically fit. They could fight, and they made a name for themselves in the streets. They were respected and feared in our Bay Area neighborhood. But he wasn't the only man in my life my three uncles were the dominant influence. Daddy, as I called him, was the closest thing I ever had to a father. We spent time together and he made me feel safe. Instead, I had my grandfather and my uncles. Shipping may be from our UK warehouse or from our Australian or US warehouses, depending on stock availability.Growing up, I didn't have a father around. The lessons in these pages will free us to have-and become-the kind of dad we wish for. I Wish My Dad helps fathers, and their sons move through the past to find deep connection in the present. And with no pretense, he and Jordan recount their own I Wish My Dad interview, which helped them chart the way toward a transformed relationship. Tune also offers us strategies and prompts for initiating our own I Wish My Dad conversations. In the pages of this book, he invites us into the room as the men unpack relationships with their fathers, learn to work through emotional pain, recount moments of tenderness and care, and describe risks they took to heal and connect with their fathers. So he sat down with seventeen men of diverse ages, ethnicities, and socioeconomic backgrounds for I Wish My Dad conversations. He began to wonder if other men also longed to have vulnerable conversations with their fathers-about good memories, about pain, and about what their relationship could still become. After years of inner work via therapy and faith, Tune realized that neither he nor his dad possessed what they needed to live up to each other's expectations. He and his dad connected briefly when he was a teenager, and then had no relationship for decades.
What do sons wish they had received from their fathers? What might honest, healing conversations between fathers and sons look like? Tune was raised mostly without a father. From author, speaker, and social entrepreneur Romal Tune and his son, Jordan, comes this tour de force for fathers and sons about healing the unfinished business between them. But those four words hold the power to heal wounds men may not even know they carry.
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